Armageddon is a-coming next year, if the Mayan calendar is to be believed, but if you plan on surviving the apocalypse, rest assured all your favourite, ahem, streaming video websites will be operational in the End Times. How so? By operating out of a special apocalypse-proof bunker one studio is having built. No, seriously.
They say porn is always pioneering new technologies, but in this case, one raunchy publisher is planning on keeping tech alive, even after the coming apocalypse, widely predicted by the Mesoamericans and Roland Emmerich to take place late next year.
In a bone fide statement to journalists, porn studio Pink Visual, known for PinkVisualPad, the first adult website optimised for the Apple iPad, has just announced that it’s building a huge underground bunker to survive 2012, complete with fully-stocked bars, performance stages, and even a studio to carry on shooting.
“We’re not building this thing just to eke out a few more months of a deprived, downscaled existence,” says spokesperson Quentin Boyer. “Our goal is nothing less than to survive the apocalypse to come in comfort and luxury, whether that catastrophe takes the form of fireballs flung Earthward by an all-seeing deity, extended torrential rainfall, Biblical rapture, an earthquake-driven mega-tsunami, radioactive flesh-eating zombies, or some combination of the above.”
The company plans to keep its website online throughout, to entertain those not yet eviscerated. “We also intend to maintain our website update schedule throughout the ordeal, even if those websites are only available on the bunker’s self-contained local network by that time,” he said.
That’s good to know. Pink Visual is keeping the location of the bunker (as well as whether this is just a cry/publicity stunt for attention) secret, but Boyer says that Pink Visual actresses, customers and Twitter followers may get priority “over the general public”.
